Stop commanding children to respect their elders
The elders must first learn to respect children
I have gravitated towards old people as far back as I can remember. There has been a few keystone elders in my life that have made a mark within my heart. My grandmothers have all passed. I only spent a handful of times with my fathers mother, for they were estranged, and while I was close to my mothers mother, she was not exactly a wise woman. She was sweet to me and gave me songs and affection, but good advice? Not even close. She once suggested that I get breast implants and fix my postpartum body for my husbands sake, to save my marriage, because birth had left me ugly and unlovable. She meant well, but her advice was toxic and rooted in a male oriented mindset, which I understand given the culture she was raised in. I am one of many women who are mothering without their mothers. Many of us grieve the loss of our mothers while living. They are not actively participating in our lives for a variety of reasons, and the absence of the mother has left a gap in our hearts that cannot be filled by anyone. I still look for her in women, I still crave the love and support of a mother. There is a reason why I keep trying to befriend an older wise woman. I have made attempts to befriend crones and elders in hopes that I would be mentored and that we would weave a reciprocal relationship. I too have gifts to share with them. I have been terribly discouraged by the lack of awareness and self indulgence of the women I have met. Now I know i can have high expectations and, I am also empathic and understanding. I however, cannot tolerate disrespect, and it is this lack of boundaries and reverence many elders have for children that has turned me off completely. I have met many elderly women through our garden circles and women’s circles, so you’d think that these women would be attuned to a higher state of consciousness. I don’t mean to sound judgemmetal, and I still hold the torch of hope high above my head. Many times I was made aware of how many crones resist the aging process, it’s apparently a common occurrence. How can there be wisdom in a person that rejects nature?
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